


where you don't see me

by boylove



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: M/M, im gay and self indulgent
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-04
Updated: 2019-04-04
Packaged: 2020-01-04 19:16:24
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 422
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18350009
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/boylove/pseuds/boylove
Summary: Yaku's writing this at 3am.





	where you don't see me

**Author's Note:**

> I don't need the world to see 
> 
> That I've been the best I can be, but 
> 
> I don't think I could stand to be 
> 
> Where you don't see me

Yaku _hates_ it.

Really.

Because it's pathetic. Because maybe if he could stop thinking about Kuroo fucking Tetsurou, he could sleep.

But he _can't._ He can't stop thinking about him and he _knows_ that'll be his downfall.

Kuroo doesn't like him, he never had. The possibility of pursuing a relationship was out of the ballpark. Nearly impossible. It was kinda funny, honestly, how surreal it seemed.

If only he could come to terms with that.

But, he can't. Something swells inside of him that makes him fall all over. It doesn't matter how many times he tries to push down the feelings and just be an asset to his team. But Kuroo has a nice smile and he's funny and sweet and-

Yaku shifts in his bed.

1,000 messages never sent. 1,000 things never said and a million times spent in the same position and IT'S-

Destructive.

It's destructive, how much he likes him.

He can pinpoint the exact moment it started. When they sat up past curfew outside, talking about the future and all the goals they wanted to achieve. He remembers pulling grass out of the ground and throwing it into the air while he mumbled on about what scared him. Leaving Nekoma, going to college, moving away from all he knew.

“I guess we're both not ready for the adult thing?”

Yaku smiled weakly.

Guess they weren't.

That had done him in. Practically ruined his life. It was as though a light switched on in his brain, a stubborn light that never allowed him to live down this stupid crush he had on him.

All he ever thought about nowadays was Tetsurou.

He sighs and rolls over.

Yaku swallows in an attempt to wash away the dryness in his throat. Just the thought of Kuroo was enough to make his heart speed up.

 _This is unhealthy. God this is so fucking unhealthy_.

He picks up his phone.

 _“Hey Tetsurou,”_ he starts to type, _“It's fucking ridiculous I know. And it wasn't supposed to happen, but I like you. I like you so much. I love your dumb fucking smile and the way you tease me. Even if you're annoying as shit. I love how annoying you are. I can’t stop thinking about you, and I think that's the worst of it. I can't keep pining over you. Just tell me you don't like me so I can live my life sad and lonely. Thanks.”_

He reads over the message.

He doesn't hit send.

He never hits send.

**Author's Note:**

> I'm self indulgent and gay lol hmu @yakuros


End file.
